Dating can feel like navigating a social minefield. From crafting the perfect profile to suggesting the ideal activity, there’s a lot to consider. One often-overlooked aspect is the timing. What time should a drinks date actually start? It might seem trivial, but the starting time can significantly influence the date’s success. Let’s explore the nuances of timing your drinks date for maximum impact.
The Power of Primetime: Why Timing Matters
The time you choose for your drinks date sets the tone. It influences everything from the atmosphere to the potential for future plans. A poorly chosen time can lead to awkwardness, rushed conversations, or even a feeling that one person isn’t truly invested.
A well-chosen time, on the other hand, creates a relaxed and inviting atmosphere. It provides ample opportunity for conversation and allows for spontaneity, should the date go well. Think of it as setting the stage for a successful performance.
Decoding the Common Times: 6 PM, 7 PM, and 8 PM
Let’s break down the most common times for a drinks date, analyzing their pros and cons. Each has its own unique vibe and implications.
The 6 PM Start: A Weekday Wind-Down
A 6 PM start is often associated with weeknight dates. It suggests a casual encounter after work, a chance to unwind and get to know each other.
This time slot can be beneficial for those with busy schedules. It allows for a relatively early night, minimizing the impact on work or other commitments the next day. It signals that you are considerate of the other person’s time.
However, a 6 PM date can also feel rushed. Traffic might be heavy, both of you might be tired after a long day, and there’s an implicit understanding that it’s a shorter engagement.
The 7 PM Start: The Classic Choice
The 7 PM start time is arguably the most popular option for a drinks date, and for good reason. It offers a balanced approach between a quick after-work drink and a full-blown evening outing.
7 PM allows enough time for people to get home, freshen up, and travel to the meeting location without feeling overly stressed. It offers a comfortable buffer and communicates consideration for their schedule.
This time also allows for flexibility. If the date is going well, you can easily extend it to dinner or another activity. If it’s not a match, you can wrap things up without feeling like you’ve wasted an entire evening.
The 8 PM Start: Late Night Vibes
An 8 PM start time suggests a more relaxed and potentially longer evening. It’s often favored for weekend dates or for individuals who prefer a later schedule.
Starting at 8 PM can be ideal if you’re aiming for a more sophisticated or intimate atmosphere. Many bars and lounges have a different energy later in the evening, offering a more conducive environment for deep conversation.
However, an 8 PM start also carries some risks. It might be too late for some people, especially on a weeknight. It also implies a greater commitment of time and energy, which might intimidate some potential dates.
Factors to Consider When Choosing a Time
Choosing the right time involves considering a variety of factors. Here are some key aspects to keep in mind.
Your and Your Date’s Schedules
The most important factor is undoubtedly your and your date’s schedules. Consider work hours, commute times, and any other commitments. It’s always best to suggest a time that works well for both of you. Open communication is essential here. Asking about their availability and preferences shows respect and consideration.
The Day of the Week
Weekdays and weekends have different implications. Weekday dates, as mentioned, often suggest a shorter, more casual encounter. Weekend dates imply a greater investment of time and energy.
A Wednesday date, for example, might be perfect for a low-pressure mid-week break. A Saturday date, on the other hand, might be better suited for a more elaborate evening.
The Location’s Atmosphere
The location itself plays a significant role. Some bars are bustling at 6 PM, while others don’t truly come alive until later in the evening. Research the venue beforehand to get a sense of its peak hours.
Consider the noise level, the lighting, and the overall vibe. A quiet, intimate bar might be ideal for a later start, while a lively pub might be better suited for an earlier meetup.
Your Intentions for the Date
Are you looking for a quick and casual introduction, or are you hoping for a deeper connection? Your intentions should influence your choice of time.
If you’re aiming for a low-pressure first encounter, a 6 PM or 7 PM start might be ideal. If you’re hoping to spend several hours getting to know each other, an 8 PM start might be more appropriate.
Beyond the Hour: Fine-Tuning Your Timing Strategy
It’s not just about the hour itself, but also about the context surrounding the chosen time. Here are some additional tips for fine-tuning your timing strategy.
Consider Travel Time
Always factor in travel time. Make sure both of you have enough time to get to the location without feeling rushed or stressed. Providing clear directions or suggesting transportation options can also be helpful.
If the location is difficult to reach or parking is limited, consider choosing a time that allows for extra travel time. Being late can create a negative first impression.
Offer Options
Don’t just suggest one time. Offer a few options to give your date some flexibility and control. This shows that you’re considerate of their schedule and willing to work around their needs.
For example, you could say, “I’m free either Tuesday at 7 PM or Wednesday at 6 PM. Which works better for you?”
Be Punctual
Once you’ve agreed on a time, be punctual. Arriving on time demonstrates respect for your date’s time and shows that you’re reliable.
If you anticipate being late, communicate as soon as possible. A simple text message explaining the situation and providing an estimated arrival time can go a long way.
The Follow-Up: Timing Your Next Move
The timing of your next move after the date is just as important as the initial start time. Here’s how to handle the follow-up.
The “Thank You” Text
Send a brief “thank you” text within 24 hours of the date. This shows appreciation for their time and reinforces that you enjoyed the encounter, regardless of how you feel about future possibilities.
Keep the message short and sweet. A simple “I had a great time meeting you last night!” is sufficient.
The Second Date Proposal
If you’re interested in a second date, don’t wait too long to propose it. Waiting more than a few days can make it seem like you’re not genuinely interested.
Suggest a specific activity and time frame. This shows that you’ve put thought into the proposal and are serious about seeing them again.
The Bottom Line: There’s No One-Size-Fits-All Answer
Ultimately, there’s no single “perfect” time to start a drinks date. The ideal time depends on a variety of factors, including your schedules, the day of the week, the location’s atmosphere, and your intentions for the date. The key is to be thoughtful, considerate, and communicative. Choose a time that works well for both of you and sets the stage for a relaxed and enjoyable encounter. By paying attention to these details, you can significantly increase your chances of a successful date.
What’s the ideal start time for a drinks date if I want it to feel casual and low-pressure?
A start time between 6:00 PM and 7:00 PM is generally perfect for a casual drinks date. This allows you both to ease into the evening after work, without the commitment of a full dinner. It provides an opportunity to unwind and connect without feeling rushed, creating a relaxed atmosphere that encourages open conversation.
This timeframe offers flexibility. If things are going well, you can easily extend the date or transition to dinner. Conversely, if you’re not feeling a connection, it’s a natural endpoint after a couple of drinks, without any awkwardness about cutting a planned meal short. It allows both parties to easily gauge interest and level of comfort.
How does the day of the week impact the best time to schedule a drinks date?
Weeknights, such as Tuesdays, Wednesdays, or Thursdays, typically warrant earlier start times like 6:00 PM or 6:30 PM. People are generally more mindful of work schedules and wanting to get adequate rest before the next day. An earlier start allows for a comfortable date without feeling pressured to stay out late.
Fridays and Saturdays offer more flexibility. Starting between 7:00 PM and 8:00 PM can be ideal, allowing for a more leisurely pace and the potential for a longer evening. People are often more relaxed and open to staying out later on weekends, making a later start time more suitable for fostering a deeper connection and exploring further activities.
What if my potential date has a long commute or unpredictable work schedule?
Communication is key! Discussing potential start times and being flexible is crucial when one or both of you have challenging commutes or unpredictable work schedules. Suggest a slightly later start time that accommodates their travel or allow for a buffer in case of delays, showing consideration for their circumstances.
Consider alternative options like meeting closer to their workplace or suggesting a location with easy access to public transportation. Offering alternatives demonstrates your understanding and willingness to make the date work for both of you. This can create a positive first impression and build rapport before you even meet.
What if I prefer daytime dates? Is there a good time for a drinks date in the afternoon?
Absolutely! A mid-afternoon drinks date can be a refreshing alternative, especially on weekends. A start time between 2:00 PM and 3:00 PM allows for a relaxed and daytime-appropriate setting. It’s perfect for enjoying the weather, exploring a new area, or simply having a more laid-back and less pressure-filled encounter.
This timeframe also provides ample opportunity to transition into other activities if the date is going well, such as a walk in the park, browsing a local market, or catching an early movie. It offers a different dynamic than an evening date, allowing for a more casual and authentic interaction.
How can I politely suggest a different start time if the initial suggestion doesn’t work for me?
Be upfront and honest, but also considerate. Acknowledge the other person’s suggestion and then explain your constraints. Offer an alternative that works better for you, explaining briefly why that time is preferable. This demonstrates respect and a willingness to compromise.
For example, you could say, “Thanks for suggesting 6:00 PM! That sounds fun, but I usually don’t get out of work until closer to 6:30 PM. Would you be open to meeting around 7:00 PM instead? That would give me time to get there and unwind a bit.” This approach maintains a positive tone and encourages a collaborative discussion.
Should I adjust the start time depending on the type of bar or venue we’re going to?
Yes, the type of bar or venue can definitely influence the ideal start time. A bustling, popular bar might be best visited earlier in the evening (6:00 PM – 7:00 PM) to avoid long waits and crowded conditions, allowing for a more comfortable and intimate conversation. This avoids the peak hours when noise levels are high and finding seating can be challenging.
For a more relaxed setting, like a wine bar or a quiet pub, a slightly later start time (7:00 PM – 8:00 PM) could be preferable. This allows for a more leisurely pace and creates a more relaxed atmosphere conducive to deeper conversation. Consider the ambiance and typical crowd levels when making your decision.
What if I’m not sure what time my date prefers? How can I figure it out without directly asking?
Subtly gauge their availability by mentioning your own schedule. For example, you could say, “I’m pretty flexible next week. I have a few things going on, but I’m mostly free after work.” This opens the door for them to share their availability without directly being asked about a specific time preference.
Pay attention to their responses in conversations leading up to the date. Do they frequently mention being busy in the evenings, or do they seem to have more free time? These subtle cues can provide insights into their preferred start times without you having to directly inquire. Use this information to suggest a time that aligns with their perceived schedule.